Parenting Goals in the New Year
This is always an exciting time of year because we are ready to try new things or improve on things we have been doing. Parenting is one of these areas. Being a parent can be challenging. The New Year is a great time to evaluate yourself as a parent and look at areas you can improve on with your child. I created 6 areas that you can review and evaluate how you are doing as a parent. On a scale of 1 to 5 (often) where would you rate yourself in the following areas?
1. Quality time – How much quality time do you spend with your child?
Quality time is the time you spend listening, talking, and interacting with your child. You can do this any time throughout the day. If you are working on a project at home, find a way where your child can be involved. Showing them new things and talking to them about how they are feeling are great ways to connect and bond with your child.
2. Encouraging your child- How often do you encourage your child?
You can encourage your child throughout the day in many ways. It’s a word or a phrase that sends the message, “You are special.” It’s pointing out the positive things you see them doing at home or at school. It’s letting them know that you are noticing and are proud of them. Positive reinforcement will also encourage more repetitive positive behavior, which is what we want from our children!
3. Being involved in their activities- How involved are you with your child?
Do you make an effort to attend their activities, school plays, sports, etc? If you are unavailable during their performances do you make an effort to practice with them? The goal is to find opportunities to show them that you care about what they are doing and are supportive of them.
4. Discip lining your child- How often do you discipline your child?
Do you find yourself disciplining too much or too little? Are there times that you could discipline but are too tired or depend on your spouse to do it? You may have the opposite problem. The goal is to discipline appropriately and make sure that your spouse helps as well. You want this to be as balanced as possible so that your children know that both of you will respond the same.
5. Consistency- Are you following through with your child when you discipline?
It’s important that when you discipline your child that you also follow through with the consequence you’ve given them. It’s also important that you provide the same consequence for the same behavior so that they know what to expect. When you find that the consequence doesn’t work anymore then try a new one but stay consistent. The predictability will help your child make good decisions. It also prevents arguments because they know what will happen when they don’t make the best decisions!
6. Providing Structure- Is the day structured for your child?
Does your child know what to expect in the morning, when they get home from school, and at bed time? Do you have a routine for breakfast and getting ready in the morning? Having structure in the household can help eliminate arguments in the morning and at bed time. It also provides security, reassurance, and predictable for your child. Do your best to provide structure where you can. This can help bring peace to the entire family.
Once you have evaluated yourself in these six areas, you can formulate a goal that works for you. You and your spouse may have different parenting goals. Write your goals down on paper and post it somewhere visible so that you can view it often. Every week make an effort to connect with your spouse and be accountable to each other to reach your new parenting goals. Your children will notice the difference and you will notice it in their behavior and your relationship with them!
Wishing you continued success in the New Year raising your Children!
Past Articles:
The 5 Love Languages of Children- Click Here!
A Toddler's Language Development - What's appropriate?
Helping When a Child Loses A Loved One
Prevent Holiday Behavior Problems
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